The weather has been amazing recently.

Another good day at work in the sun and every day I am feeling more positive and forward-thinking in my position.  It has taken me a little bit of time to adjust, and with a fully sober head, work feels a lot different and more fulfilling.

Today I was having a chat with a friend and in the conversation my friend mentioned how having a second child has made them put their life into more perspective.  My friend use to smoke cannabis on a regular basis, but since the birth of the second child, they have cut down to only having one just before bed.

I asked my friend why they have made this change, the response was quick and simple.  “I don’t want my children to be affected and want to be the best parent I can be”.

My friend said how this was an easy decision to make and seemed natural to them, and that they have stuck to it ever since.  I have a lot of admiration for my friend to be able to recognise their addiction and make changes for not just them, but the family as a whole.

This conversation also made me think about the weekend that I have coming up.  On Saturday I have an event that I will be attending.  This will be the first time in my recovery and since coming out of rehab, that I will be around a large group of people drinking.  I could decline to attend like I have done the previous weekends with friends in beer gardens, but this event is a personal one, for which I feel I should attend and catch up with many loved ones.

I am slightly anxious about this.  I know that at the event I will be absolutely fine, as like previous events like this, I have always driven there and back, so I will not have any desire to have a drink.  My issue will be the drive home.  This is where my trigger has arisen previously.  I have always stopped at the shop and bought a bottle of wine.

Overthinking this for the next 4 days, until the event, will be a downfall.  So I must not overthink it.  I feel strong enough within myself now that I can attend and safely drive home without buying alcohol.  However, I must keep this in mind on Saturday and use the techniques I have learnt to stay strong.

I think my anxiety may be higher on Saturday morning, but I know I will feel proud of myself when I return home without any alcohol.  I will not stay long and if I am feeling anxious at any point during the time I am there, I will speak up to some people and deal with my issue head-on.  I will be;

Last to arrive and first to leave!